


"love is about sacrifice"

by grapejuiceantidote (riddleb9y)



Series: But, I'm Doing This For Your Own Good [2]
Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Declarations Of Love, F/F, Fix-It, Getting Together, M/M, Multiple Personalities, Oswald Cobblepot and Edward Nygma in Love, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Season/Series 05, mentioned Kristen and Isabelle(a?), oswald got treatment, the brother's bit never happened, the riddler loves oswald and ed, this started off as a rant, totally au bc season 5 made me sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-16
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-18 02:40:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,005
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29482365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/riddleb9y/pseuds/grapejuiceantidote
Summary: i'm slowly rewriting season four and five to fix it
Relationships: Oswald Cobblepot/Edward Nygma
Series: But, I'm Doing This For Your Own Good [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2123502
Comments: 4
Kudos: 21





	"love is about sacrifice"

**Author's Note:**

> this is just for fun and personal validation bc i've already fixed gotham in my head

The GCPD was bustling with government officials and Gotham survivors while the Riddler watched through Ed's eyes. He pities Ed for waiting among st the disarray, appearing out of place amongst the sickbay. Not to mention, three days spent by Oswald’s bed earned them pity from Just about everyone. He cherished Oswald, but Ed hadn’t slept beyond brief naps and wasn't bothering with eating. Oswald’s blown-out eye worried him, sending him on a guilt trip to hell. Love is about sacrifice. He practically condemned this. But Ed vowed he loathed Oswald, promising they were only using him to escape the city. Sacrifice, like abandoning their submarine to fight with Oswald with Jim Gordon? Ed's feelings were an enigma, challenging the Riddler day in and day out.

“Let me take over, rotting away won't help, Ozzie.” Ed's physical tension and lack of response prompted him to try again. “Come on I’ll behave. Don’t you trust me?”

Like a child throwing whatever they can find to justify their stubbornness, Ed argues, “You stabbed Lee." But, the whisper lacks accusation and he knows Ed doesn't hold a grudge, Lee stabbed them first.

However, directly reminding Ed will create unwanted turmoil. Comfort is the better approach. “Eddie, come on, I thought you didn’t care about him. He killed Isabella. He froze us.”

“He saved me.” Ed licks his lips, looking down with watering eyes.

The utterance brought an indescribable vindication. “You love him.”

Ed didn’t protest, the poor fool. Why couldn’t he learn? Lee had stabbed him and manipulated Ed. Kirsten fell for them, before crying Ed was a monster. And Isabella ruined their empire with Gotham, twisting their mind in inconceivable shapes. 

Oswald betrayed their trust, then they killed him and he froze them. But they both sacrificed themselves for the other. Unencumbered. Why couldn't Ed follow one rule? He had! Sacrificing the only person who recognized him for Ed! But there was a chance, for Ed and Oswald. If only Ed would take care of himself.

"Let me get us something to eat and put you to bed." Without protest, Ed relaxed, giving the Riddler full control and drifting into a mental sleep. 

True to his word, he guided them toward the meal area. There was a designated mealtime, but Leslie would make an exception. He assumed she felt a responsibility for Ed after stabbing him and condoning his mental illness until she had what she needed. Not to mention the surprising increase in supplies since the government began rehabilitating Gotham and caring for the refugees. 

As he approached the table, the sight of Foxy and Lee delighted him. His appearance startled them, but they remained neutral. "Hello, Foxy. Lee," he grinned. 

Leslie replied. "So you're magically over your pity party?" 

"More guilt, less pity," he corrected. "And I doubt it's through, we just need rest."

"We? As in-"

"Correct, Foxy." He motioned toward the crates. "So how does this work, because we're on the brink of dehydration and totally sleep deprived."

Surprised at how they doted on him, the Riddler played along with their niceties. Asking about Barbara and baby Barbara, Jimbo and the medical center. They were patient, while he ate and drank, not interrupting. Afterward, they tried leading him to the spare cots in the M.E. room, but he refused. Preventing Ed's anxiety attacks was a considerable skill, but he's trained in understanding Ed. Ed would freak if he woke up without Oswald. 

"I'm going back to Oswald." They goggled at him, "Ed wants to know Oswald's alright. I promised him." 

"You're too tall to sleep in that chair," Lee tries to reasoning. Even if the reminder is pointless. He's already heading back, the two trailing him.

Stopped by a calm hand on his shoulder, he turns to see Lucius. His expression is perfectly calm, leaving no room for argument when he states, "We'll get a cot. You can bring it to where Oswald's at."

He admitted defeat, following behind with Leslie on his tail. Probably because he's mentally unstable and a threat. Maybe it's because he's stumbling with every step. 

Entering Jim's office, the three remained stifling silently. Lee took it upon herself to carry the cot while Lucius held Ed up. They maneuvered themselves back to Oswald, who was still asleep with bandages covering his face and cheap machines monitoring his vitals. Pulling away from Lucius, Riddler came up to Oswald's bedside and pressed a kiss to the man's temple. 

Lee and Lucius shared concerned looks before laying down the poor excuse of a bed. There was already a spare blanket and pillow, which Lee left there a day prior. When they finished setting up space, Lucius clasped the Riddler's shoulder.

"You should lay down," he said, pleading with deaf ears.

Lee interfered with the Riddler's silence first. "Your body needs rest. Not just Ed. I'll check over Oswald if you're that worried."

He gave them a hesitant nod. Not bothering with his clothes, he climbed onto the cot, watching Leslie fiddle with an iv.

"I always took Ed as the sentimental side of you."

He turned toward Lucius. The man was studying him, intrigued by his state of vulnerability. "He is. He loves Oswald too."

"Which one of you killed him?"

He expected a prying question, but he hadn't anticipated his own honesty.

"I killed him because he broke Ed the grief was killing him. He needed the game," He dragged his eyes away to glance up at Lucius. "But, I was heartbroken as Ed was hunting down Oswald's replacement. Lost without Oswald, without me. I took over eventually. "

"In the car?"

"Yep, Eddie needed me."

"You must care about him." 

The answer was yes. No doubt about it, 

"He's my responsibility." Humiliation crept into his chest. "An emotional wreck, but he's sweet." He directed his focus to Lee.

"I believe it. I hope to meet him one day."

"You have."

"Not without you," Lucius answers for her, ending the pending conversation. "Sleep well."

…..

As Oswald stirs, he feels delicate circles rub against his knuckles. Opening his eye is a whole new experience wincing at the impossibly uncomfortable light. But soothing feeling motivates him to try, to settle his curiosity, and see who it is. The sight of Ed's messy hair and a pale complexion is predictable. Who else would be there for him? His mother's been gone for years. And friends, well Ed is his only friend. 

The jabbing pain from the side of his face doesn't matter when Ed notices he's awake. Because he's beaming like a mad man, shouting for Lee without his eyes leaving Oswald. Their hands connected, making Ed disoriented as he fills a plastic cup with the water picture. He hands it over with unusual triumph, and Oswald grasps it, leading the cup's rim to his mouth. 

They have to talk. Beyond Ed's directions for every prescription or the in-between apologies. Three day, he's well enough to leave. But he can't tell Ed. So he waits for Ed to grab them lunch. He's not a coward, but there's one thing he knows, love is his biggest fault and worst compass. 

.....

The rain pounds on the historic, torn, buildings of Gotham. They stand outside, face to face under the conduit line that provides shelter and momentary dryness. He's surprised Ed notice.

Fully prepared to let Ed watch him to avoid the confrontation, Oswald hears the taller man call out, "I don't want you to leave me again."

The rawness in Ed's voice stings but Oswald swallows his relief, trying to pinpoint Ed's motives. "Last year you were willing to kill me."

But that was before Martin and the Gotham apocalypse. Before slow nights musing about their plans for the mainland, and before Ed's resentment left. 

"I know, and I'm sorry." Ed's eyes gleam with guilt, "Honestly Oswald, I just, I'm so sorry. For everything. I loved you."

Loved. That word breaks Oswald's heart like an unloaded gun. Oswald's ready to storm off, unprepared for a heart to heart on brotherhood or another cheap excuse for why fate's cruelty seems never-ending.

"I can't run in this repetition forever. I've liked you since the GCPD, I've loved you since your mayoral campaign," Ed reaches out for Oswald's hand, fingers deliberate as they curve around the thin wrist. "The city is starting anew, and you choose to stay. Can't we do the same?"

Ed said a dying man would do anything to save his skin, profess anything. But, he also said sacrifice, love is about sacrifice. Oswald sacrificed his body, freedom, and revenge for Ed's love, but maybe Ed's just a dying man.

"Ed, we can't decide to move past everything. And-"

His reasoning is distracted as Ed pulls his hands away to rub away streaking tears, reminding Oswald of the peer. The dewy fog and his sobs, the splash of water. How he cried twice as hard after freezing Ed. Oswald is sure Ed blubbered after the Kringle woman's death but when Isabella died he seized up, on autopilot with the darker, stronger side of himself. If the Riddler declared his feelings, he wouldn't be crying, not even to save his own skin. This is Ed, crying not for mercy, but in defeat.

Reaching out his hand, Oswald begins wiping the tears, ignoring the mumbled apologies. Fate has escorted them here. Illogical and wearing, fate has had them wrapped around each other, tangling their intentions but forbidding departure. Fate is still a sadist.

"Edward, I shouldn't be in love with you. But as fate would have it, I am." He moves closer, ignoring the crack of thunder. “I never stopped, it's been covered up by anger and jealousy. But, I never knew how to pull away, not like you." 

At the assertion, Ed cripples, face contorting in confusion and grief. “How couldn’t I? You’re my best friend and I, even after Isabella. I needed you. I wanted to bring you back, to apologize. You hurt me, but I've done the same.” With Kristen and Dougherty.

The apology flares anger Oswald had nearly forgotten. Because words don't cover scar tissue around the bullet wound that's lyrically dripping bullet wound hardening Oswald's heart. “Why didn’t you? You’ve had time. I've had patience. All you’ve accomplished is throwing tantrums! Not to mention you tried shooting me- again!” He snaps the final word, huffing out the overdue words.

“I’m sorry, I just- I couldn’t admit," he stutters, squinting while pinching his nose bridge. "Admit that I love you or prove you love me. And then,” He laughs, voice cracking. “You were a threat, someone I had to seek out. It was a desperate compulsive need to complete what happened with Kirsten again. I regret killing her, and it hurt, but part of me could live it and I survived. But that part of me can't handle losing you.” Taking a quivering breath, he laughs, "I wanted to apologized and explain, this whole time. Since the pier."

The explanation leaves Oswald stunned, hollow. It's the sincerest oration he's been give, but does it warrant anything? And if so, how does one go about forgiveness? Before Haven, Oswald would’ve rejected a restart. 

He can only back away, dampening the top of his hair as soon as he leaves the shelter. Ed, whose curious eyes stare with obvious exhaustion as Oswald moves farther back, follows. Satisfying Oswald with every drop of water dotting his glasses.

Standing still as Ed comes increasingly close again, Oswald sighs. “Come with me. They don’t need you here. Not right now. We can find our way home.”

Like an eager puppy, Ed tilts his head. “You want me to- the mansion?”

They nearly facing now, far closer than when they first met or any of their departures. “Yes Edward, if you want to.”

Ed tentatively cups Oswald’s cheek, nodding and incoherent mumbling in agreement until he asks, “Can I kiss you?” Voice crystal clear.

Leaning in Oswald whispers, "When we get home, away from here. Like it should've been."  
…..

**Author's Note:**

> sorry if it was wonky, i kept going back and the writing got choppy :/ all mistakes are mineeeee!
> 
> kudos and feedback are appreciated!!!


End file.
